Well I Never Did

Examiner of Plays' Summary:

This is not quite so imbecile as the average revue; it is, however, very vulgar in tone and occasionally coarse. It begins in Hyde Park with 2 male comedians, John and Joe and a female, Mrs. Briggs; the main business is Joe's being given a parcel to hold, which turns out to be a baby, being accused of being its father and the baby when seen, being black. A second business is also introduced, an affair with a policeman, a nursemaid, Mrs. Briggs, who takes the baby, a father claiming it and so on. Then comes a coffee stall scene with various business of the comedians. Then in Paris, we have the familiar jokes about the language, a restaurant scene, Mrs. Briggs searching for her husband and so forth. I do not doubt that the production will be "broad" and near the line. I cannot find any definite points to notice, however, except the following: Scene 1 p.12 "she takes out teat and gives it to the baby". This is quite extraordinary and must of course be cut out. A caution, generally, about all this baby business might be given in addition. Scene 2 p.6, a joke about an orange being a "naval" shape to be cut. Scene 2 p.7, a joke about twins and the Queen of Spain might as well be cut out, perhaps also scene 2 p.3 "tells story of neutral": perhaps we should have this [cut] on the chance of it being offensive. And last page "Two Mays Speciality" details of this should be sent. Some songs are given, but others are not, and must, be sent in if unpublished [...]